The continuing tale of my summer holiday...
For late arrivals, this is the saga of what happens when you spy a holiday opportunity from a TV show.
For late arrivals, this is the saga of what happens when you spy a holiday opportunity from a TV show.
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| Humphrey Bogart |
There is a quote attributed to Humphrey Bogart goes something like this
"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
Nowhere is this more apparent than at any airport in the UK in the midst of a holiday season. And Newcastle was no exception. The holiday started early for many expectant tourists including ourselves. I even had a chance to sidle up to one of my work colleague's progeny and put him in fear that the long reach of his Mother might well reach all the way to Magaluf! (it does by the way)
The announcement of our gate for the flight to Rome was made and we stood from our position in the bar, swayed slightly and started to make our way, along with approximately 150 of our fellow travellers. Most of whom had also indulged in a beverage or two. The staff obviously hadn't indulged in a beverage (can't speak for the flight crew!), as a result the quote stands because there is nothing worse than a sober person amongst a group of drinkers. also nothing worse for a sober person than a group of drinkers. The "happy" drinkers are in a completely different place to the staff. And sometimes it shows.
Still, we were at the departure gate and awaiting our boarding instructions. I glanced out of the window and became aware that our plane was not exactly Chameleon like but definitely confused. All the words on the plane spelt "JET2"but the tail insignia showed an insignia I am sure belonged to another company once. I did not make this identification to my Wife. She had already been wound up by a neighbour who pointed out that Jet2 own and operate some of the oldest commercial jet liners in the UK. Not a fact she had wished to be made aware of. There was no point telling her these aircraft are designed for a long life - so they should considering how much they cost!
I find this part of the journey to be the least edifying of my journey. We are penned in like sheep, a few windows available to so that we may watch our luggage being flung about the tarmac. This reminds me of an incidence that occurred to me a few years back in Amsterdam. Follow the link for the details
After what seemed like for ever, whilst nothing very much happened, we were called forward to board our aircraft. My wife gave a reluctant sigh and we joined the throng.
I always marvel at modern aircraft as I cross the threshold of the cabin. It is all calm and smiles as we enter but in a short time the forces of physics that will be exerted on the exterior of the aeroplane are way beyond what a human can experience. The outside temperature is about -60 centigrade and the air is rushing along the fuselage at close to 600 mph.
Any way back to our flight. We were pretty close to the back of the cabin. I had a window seat and my wife was next to me which was a relief as I was too cheap to cough the extra £5 to ensure we sat together when we booked the flight. I believe Jet2 have won awards as an airline. The cabin was in good shape and belied the aircraft's age. Just as well.
However I did note that the seats were stripped back to the absolute bare minimum as far as structure went. I did wonder whether they had managed to cram another couple of rows in as a result! It felt like one of those parties games I played as a kid. A kind of hide and seek only in reverse where one person hides and then everyone else hunts them down. The difference is that when the hider is found the seeker has to clamber in the same hiding place. Stuck at the back I felt like I was at the end of very big game of sardines where 150 people had all clambered into the cupboard with me
Then an announcement came over the public address. It was just the usual "shut up and sit down because we want to get going!" only dressed up as "welcome aboard" type announcement. What intrigued me the first time was that it was preceded by the first few bars of the advert. It was to become something of an albatross around the neck of public announcements for the rest of the flight. ALL public address statements led with this music and by the time we had reached Rome I had heard the refrain at least 20 times.
We headed up to runway 25, waited for a another jet to land, and then lined up for a our take off run. I find take off quite exciting. That moment of trepidation when the pilots decide they are going for it, the engine note rises and off we go - we must take off. There is a little fear of the what if...? however. When I see the ground leaving me I am initially quite anxious but soon everything begins to look like Google Earth and I feel much more comfortable.
The flight travelled down the eastern coast of the leg of Italy and I was able to identify harbours and cites based on my research on the afore mention internet resource.
Irritating PA jingles aside (and it might just prevent me from travelling with them in the future), the cabin staff were great, My wife HATES flying. with a vengeance. However she does like the destinations when we get there so she goes through it. Fortunately there is medication available and it is called Sauvignon Blanc. Some premeds in the airport. Followed up by some anaesthetic on the plane and she gets through. I am better but I really cant handle turbulence and that is where I need anaesthetic.
After several anaesthetics the aircraft dipped it's nose and started its descent into Rome Fiumicino airport
Next up...
take the train
Lift problems
dysfunctional air conditioning
The etiquette of wine tasting
Still, we were at the departure gate and awaiting our boarding instructions. I glanced out of the window and became aware that our plane was not exactly Chameleon like but definitely confused. All the words on the plane spelt "JET2"but the tail insignia showed an insignia I am sure belonged to another company once. I did not make this identification to my Wife. She had already been wound up by a neighbour who pointed out that Jet2 own and operate some of the oldest commercial jet liners in the UK. Not a fact she had wished to be made aware of. There was no point telling her these aircraft are designed for a long life - so they should considering how much they cost!
I find this part of the journey to be the least edifying of my journey. We are penned in like sheep, a few windows available to so that we may watch our luggage being flung about the tarmac. This reminds me of an incidence that occurred to me a few years back in Amsterdam. Follow the link for the details
After what seemed like for ever, whilst nothing very much happened, we were called forward to board our aircraft. My wife gave a reluctant sigh and we joined the throng.
I always marvel at modern aircraft as I cross the threshold of the cabin. It is all calm and smiles as we enter but in a short time the forces of physics that will be exerted on the exterior of the aeroplane are way beyond what a human can experience. The outside temperature is about -60 centigrade and the air is rushing along the fuselage at close to 600 mph.
Any way back to our flight. We were pretty close to the back of the cabin. I had a window seat and my wife was next to me which was a relief as I was too cheap to cough the extra £5 to ensure we sat together when we booked the flight. I believe Jet2 have won awards as an airline. The cabin was in good shape and belied the aircraft's age. Just as well.
However I did note that the seats were stripped back to the absolute bare minimum as far as structure went. I did wonder whether they had managed to cram another couple of rows in as a result! It felt like one of those parties games I played as a kid. A kind of hide and seek only in reverse where one person hides and then everyone else hunts them down. The difference is that when the hider is found the seeker has to clamber in the same hiding place. Stuck at the back I felt like I was at the end of very big game of sardines where 150 people had all clambered into the cupboard with me
Then an announcement came over the public address. It was just the usual "shut up and sit down because we want to get going!" only dressed up as "welcome aboard" type announcement. What intrigued me the first time was that it was preceded by the first few bars of the advert. It was to become something of an albatross around the neck of public announcements for the rest of the flight. ALL public address statements led with this music and by the time we had reached Rome I had heard the refrain at least 20 times.
 |
| Runway 25 |
The flight travelled down the eastern coast of the leg of Italy and I was able to identify harbours and cites based on my research on the afore mention internet resource.
Irritating PA jingles aside (and it might just prevent me from travelling with them in the future), the cabin staff were great, My wife HATES flying. with a vengeance. However she does like the destinations when we get there so she goes through it. Fortunately there is medication available and it is called Sauvignon Blanc. Some premeds in the airport. Followed up by some anaesthetic on the plane and she gets through. I am better but I really cant handle turbulence and that is where I need anaesthetic.
After several anaesthetics the aircraft dipped it's nose and started its descent into Rome Fiumicino airport
Next up...
take the train
Lift problems
dysfunctional air conditioning
The etiquette of wine tasting
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